lost but not alone
by royal secrets
Summary: AU. Sasuke and Itachi live in a modern Konoha city. Life is pretty good until one night disaster strikes. As the boys are left alone in the world, they struggle to deal with fear, tragedy, loss, and lack of funds. Warning: possible character deaths in later chapters.
1. Tragedy

**A/N: my first serious fic, and it will be very serious. Don't wanna spoil anything but it deals with loss of loved ones, suicide, character death(s), and brotherly bonding. It's gonna be sad and dark so don't read if you don't like.**

Itachi was so sick of this. Every friday after picking Sasuke up from school, he had to drag him to the psychologists office. His parents insisted Itachi should go on a weekly basis to find out why he couldn't sleep. The thing was, Itachi knew why he couldn't sleep, he'd been having a reoccurring dream. It had happened about three times a week for the past eight months. In the dream he had watched everybody he ever loved die. The worst part was that he was the one killing them. Now he was sitting in Dr. Kogarashi's office, listening to her yammer on about some new medication he was meant to take. He didn't care, he never took them, they just made him tired.

" Itachi, are you listening?" Upon instinct, Itachi sat up straight and gave an attentive look. This reaction came from the 18 years of proper training from his father, Fugaku. Dr. Kogarashi simply handed him a prescription and released him. As Itachi stepped out into the waiting room he gestured to Sasuke, his little brother. Sasuke had a bored expression on his face as he spoke. "What took so long? Seriously Ita you need to hurry these meetings up, I have stuff to do." Already irritated, Itachi didn't respond, he simply rushed Sasuke out the door and into his car.

" Where do you want to go for supper? It's your week to choose." Every week after the meeting Itachi would treat Sasuke to supper. They took turns choosing where to eat. Sasuke chose a nearby burger place and they enjoyed their meals with simple small talk. Itachi asked about school, Sasuke asked about work. When they finished eating, the brothers set off for their house in a rich area. Their Father was chief of police in the city of Konoha and their mother was a real estate worker. The Uchiha's were wealthy to say the least, they lived in a mansion with a huge back yard.

When they arrived, Itachi looked up at the pale blue building he called home. He pulled into the garage, noticing that his parents' car wasn't there. He figured they had gone out on their usual friday date night and were running late. Disregarding the lack of parents, the boys went inside. Sasuke went off to do homework and Itachi took a shower, then a nap. Whike he slept he had that same dream again. In the end, just before Sasuke was killed he awoke, screaming. He felt a cold sweat running over his flesh, and he shuddered, suddenly feeling sick. He was forced to ignore all this as he heard the phone ring.

Running to the kitchen he grabbed the phone and answered. As he spoke he checked the time and found it was 9:37pm.

" Hello?"

" Hello, is this Itachi Uchiha?"

" um...yes, why do you ask?"

" Hi, I'm officer Fuuma from the Konoha police department. You might want to take a seat, I have some bad news."

As Itachi sat on one of the large kitchen chairs, his mind swirled. All the terrible possibilities of what this man could tell him next.

" I'm terribly sorry to tell you, your parents, Fugaku and Mikoto, have been in a devastating car crash. They were transported to Konoha general but were both dead on arrival. I'm terribly sorry for your loss. Is there someone you can call to look after you and your brother?"

Itachi was silent as he processed this. His parents were dead, just like that. As it hit him, tears began dripping down his cheeks.

" Um...n-no...I-I-I'm 18...I can take care of Sasuke..." he replied, not wanting to risk losing his baby brother. Now they would be all they had. The man expressed his sorrow again before hanging up, leaving Itachi alone.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Itachi slumped down in his chair. He would tell Sasuke tomorrow, he couldn't possibly do it now. He walked quietly up the stairs to Sasuke's room, to check if he had fallen asleep yet. He hoped he had, another excuse not to tell him. He opened the door a tiny bit to see Sasuke asleep with his face on his desk. His notebook open and covered in drool, as he snored quietly. Itachi entered the room long enough to move Sasuke to the bed, tuck him in and shut off the lights.

As he exited the room, Itachi slumped down against the wall, sobs racking his body. He felt so very alone right now, he needed someone to comfort him. Allowing the sadness to take over Itachi cried for what seemed like hours. When he finally stopped, he was so tired he couldn't even get to his bed. Itachi passed out cold on the hallway floor between his and Sasuke's rooms.

Itachi awoke to Sasuke shaking him and asking if he was okay. Without reply Itachi turned to Sasuke, sat up and pulled him into a warm, loving hug. Sasuke was confused but asumed Itachi needed this, so he stayed put. After a few moments the boys decided to get some breakfast. Itachi made waffles, and sat down where he'd been last night. He stared down at the phone he'd abandoned on the table the night before. It nearly brought tears to his eyes, but then he heard Sasuke ask a question. " So what, were you up late last night drinking or with some girl or what? Why'd you wake up in the hall like that? And why're you glaring at the phone like it killed someone?"

_If only you knew Sasuke, _Itachi thought. Without taking his eyes away from the phone, Itachi responded. "Uh...Sasuke, I have some bad news. Late last night...mom and dad were in a car crash. They were taken to Konoha general hospital." Before Itachi could finish Sasuke demanded " well let's go visit them baka!" This made the next three words nearly impossible for Itachi to utter. "Sasuke... they died." As Sasuke processed this information, Itachi caught him in another loving embrace. They sat there for a long time, both crying, but glad to have eachother. "So, what now Ita?" The long pause was interrupted by Sasuke's question. " My paycheck won't be enough for rent, we have to move out, and sell a bunch of our stuff to put away just in case." Sasuke nodded in agreement, but frowned. The boys were both shattered on the inside, but acting strong for eachother.

**A/N: Thanks for reading and please review. I'm super tired, it's like midnight right now so I apologize if the spelling or story is less than great.**


	2. Bullies

**A/N: I forgot the disclaimer last chapter...probably because I was half asleep...but you all know naruto is NOT mine so...yeah. Anyway I hope you like this, for once I wrote an actual plot. Its kinda sad but its still a great story.**

It had been about two weeks now since Sasuke had learned that his parents were dead. He'd decided to take some time off school to calm his mind. His two best friends, Sakura and Naruto had been bringing him homework and tutoring him when necessary. Today was his first day back at school, he felt sick but Itachi had insisted he go.

Right now Sasuke was standing at his locker, getting his books for class. He never liked school, but lately it had become a pillar of stability for Sasuke. Having found what he needed, Sasuke headed for math class. On his way there he was stopped as his books were knocked from his hands. He turned to see an older student with messy red hair and a tattoo of the kanji 'love' on his forehead. Sasuke knew this guy, Gaara Sabaku. He was in his third year and he was a royal jerk too.

"Aw, poor little orphan, didn't your mommy teach you to watch where you're going? You really should be more careful orphan boy." Sasuke was beyond frustrated now, he couldn't believe this was happening. This jerk was picking on him because his parents had died. As Sasuke leaned down to retrieve his books, Gaara shoved him. Sasuke fell face first onto the floor, letting out a small squeal as he did. The boy and his friends began laughing as tears welled up in Sasuke's eyes. Grabbing his books Sasuke ran off to the bathroom and hid in a stall.

He missed his parents so much, he felt so alone. As Sasuke cried silently, he heard the door open. He was terrified that they had come to finish the job. Sasuke was sure they would beat him to within an inch of his life. He held his breath as he waited to be found. "Sasu-chan, are you in here?" Sasuke let out a huge sigh of relief as Naruto spoke.

" Yeah, I'm here."

" I saw all that. Y'know you shouldn't let then get to you. I know you miss them, but you can't let Gaara see you like that."

"I know, it just hurts. I feel like my life will never be happy again."

" Well how about we go out for pizza after class, you, me and Sakura. I'll pay, eat as much as you want."

"Okay, Sakura's mom has to drive, Ita sold the car already."

"That's cool, I can ask her. Now let's get to class before Hatake sensei gets mad."

The two boys wandered off to math class but were given detention for being late.

Sasuke hadn't been sleeping much lately and he was realizing the effects of this now. He was seriously tired, and Hatake sensei was teaching algebra, which wasn't helping. Sasuke wanted to take a nap but he already had detention, he didn't need any more trouble right now. He felt himself slowly drift off into sleep. He figured a few minutes wouldn't hurt.

_Sasuke was standing on top of a tall building, the wind blowing in his face. From here he could see all of Konoha city. In the darkness the lights looked like stars filling the sky. He thought this must be what it was like to be a bird. Soaring above the world and all it's drama and danger. He looked down and felt a rush of power. Right here, right now, Sasuke had the ability to see it all. His whole world was stretched out before him, he could see all of the options, the choices and the consequences. Then he heard it "Mr Uchiha. Mr Uchiha wake up."_

Sasuke was jolted awake when a textbook was slammed down hard on his desk, thumping loudly. When asked what the solution for 'X' was Sasuke couldn't answer. Sasuke was then given extra detention for sleeping in class.

The rest of the day went by quickly and now Sasuke was sitting in detention. He was finishing up some homework now that Naruto had gone home, his single detention being over. They had to skip the pizza because Sakura's mom couldn't drive them he'd been working for a long time when his teacher finally released him, now he had to walk home since he'd missed the bus. After depositing his books in his locker, Sasuke started his long walk home. As he was leaving the school, he was stopped by four older boys. Gaara, his brother Kankuro, and their friends Neji and Lee.

"Hey there orphan boy, how come you're so late? Won't your mommy worry, oh wait, you don't have one anymore. Still, that doesn't mean you can do whatever you want. I think he needs to be punished, what d'ya think boys?" The others all replied with a collective 'yeah'. Sasuke was shoved to the ground and hit his head. He felt the boys kicking him, and saw Neji filming it and laughing. He couldn't breathe, he thought he was going to die. One of them landed a blow to his head, another to his stomach. He was spitting blood now as Gaara lifted him by the neck, slamming him into the wall. Sasuke felt the air knocked from his lungs again and began to cry. Gaara spit on him and slapped him in the face before dropping him back on the ground.

"What a wimp. C'mon guys, let's go. This loser isn't worth our time." With that the boys left.

Sasuke was sobbing painfully as he tried to stand. He got halfway up before falling back down. He tried again and this time succeeded. He stumbled down the road, tears flowing like a waterfall from his face. As he slowly made his way home, it began to rain, without a jacket Sasuke was soaked and frozen. He wandered toward the house at a painfully slow pace. He hurt all over.

First he had lost his parents, and now he'd been bullied and beaten for it. Sasuke couldn't understand what he'd done wrong. He didn't deserve this, did he? He had never done anything particularly awful, or illegal As he climbed the steps, Sasuke wondered why this had happened to him.

**A/N: I promise I will finish Tobi vs Akatsuki this week for those people wondering. I realky like writing this so I hope you like it too. I kinda wanted to show you all that I can be serious too. Please review with your thoughts and thanks for reading.**


	3. Drinking

**A/N: So I loved writing this so much I wrote two chapters in one day. Its so exciting. I'm writing it off the top of my head so when stuff happens I'm as surprised as you are...its SO FUN!**

Itachi had spent all day house hunting. He was looking for a small, cheap apartment, close by. He wanted to keep Sasuke in the same school, so he wouldn't be losing his friends too. He'd seen a few and scheduled a few walkthroughs for the weekend. Now he was just waiting for Sasuke to get home so they could order pizza. He'd gotten a text from Sasuke about his double detention but Sasuke was running late. He should have been home by now, maybe he was just taking his time walking home. Itachi decided that must be it, so he went into the main room to watch some television.

As Itachi turned on the t.v, he heard the door open. Finally Sasuke was home. As his baby brother stepped into the room Itachi felt like throwing up. Sasuke was spitting blood, covered in bruises, crying, and groaning in pain. Itachi ran to help him sit down and asked what had happened. Sasuke explained that four boys had beaten and spit on him when he was leaving school. Itachi filled with rage. He decided he would complain to the school about it but first he'd clean Sasuke up.

Itachi took Sasuke to the bathroom and drew him a bath. He gave him some painkillers after he'd bathed and bandaged his injuries. He was more careful than he thought he could be. He was terrified that if he pushed or pressed to hard the boy would shatter like glass. Whenever the boy so much as breathed funny, Itachi stopped and asked if he was okay.

After he'd put Sasuke to bed he emailed the school his complaints and mentioned Sasuke would be off for the rest of the week. When all of this was done it was 8:43pm so Itachi decided he would call a friend to come hang out. He would have gone to sleep but feared his reoccuring dream. He hadn't had it since his parents' deaths, which worried him greatly. He pulled out his cell phone and called his best friend Kisame. They arranged for Kisame to bring booze and be there as soon as possibl. Kisame arrived around 9:00 and by 10:00 they were drunk out of their minds. Kisame had been driven home by his room mate, Hidan.

Itachi was left alone in the house, drunk and depressed. He walked upstairs and silently stepped into his brother's room. He sat on the edge of the bed and looked down at Sasuke. The poor boy had been through so much and always with a smile. Itachi knew he was internalizing his emotions but he could do nothing about it. He decided he would have to do better for the boy, or Sasuke might lose him too. He would have lost all his loved ones and be alone. Itachi knew all too well how that felt, after so many sleepless nights due to that horrid nightmare. He would never, could never allow poor, innocent Sasuke to feel that.

Not wanting to awaken his brother, Itachi crept out into the hallway. He went downstairs and sat down at the kitchen table. He cut a slice of cake and tried to eat, but he couldn't. He felt sobs rack his body again. This had been a nightly routine for the past two weeks. Drink, cry, sleep, hangover. He was too drunk to care right now about some dumb headache. He dropped the food and picked up a nearly full bottle of sake. He guzzled the entire bottle before popping open another and finishing it off too.

In a drunken daze Itachi began sobbing uncontrollably. He slumped down further into his chair, wishing it would swallow him up so he didn't have to do this anymore. He wanted, beyond all else, to be free. He was forced to grow up as quickly as possible to suit the needs of fate. He hated fate, she was a cold-hearted woman. He wanted her to die a painful death. Like his parents no doubt had.

Itachi felt himself dozing off. He knew he would fall asleep soon but he was too drunk to care. Instead of going to bed, or even the sofa, he stayed put. A few moments later Itachi fell asleep with his face in his cake.

_Itachi was standing in a room, full of blood. It was on the floor, walls, and all over him. In the center of the room lay the bodies of his parents, and in his hand, the weapon of their destruction. Sasuke walked into the room, gasping at the sight before him. Itachi dropped the knife and backed away, noticing tears streaming down his brother's cheeks. He tried to hug Sasuke but the child backed away and ran from the room crying. Itachi was all alone now, it was all his fault. In a fit of rage he followed Sasuke outside and cornered him. Without a thought, Itachi stabbed and slashed at the boy with the knife he'd retrieved from the floor. Now they were all dead, but now he felt an unsual sense of relief. He didn't have to care anymore, he'd had an enormous weight lifted from his shoulders. Suddenly he heard Sasuke call out to him, but he was dead, wasn't he? Apparently he wasn't, he was still calling to him._

Itachi awoke to find Sasuke shaking him. "Good morning sleepy-head." Itachi felt a pounding in his head as Sasuke spoke. He was nauseous as he wiped cake from his face. "How do you feel today, and please speak quietly." Sasuke tried to claim he was fine but winced as he poured milk onto his cereal. Itachi sent him to the main room to relax. Sasuke curled up on the sofa with a blanket and watched t.v. Itachi went straight to bed, reminding Sasuke to yell if he needed anything.

At some point Itachi decided to go for a walk. He left the house and headed for the park, walked around for ten minutes then went to get supper at the ramen shop. When he got to Ichiraku he saw a young blonde boy, who he recognized as Sasuke's best friend, Naruto. The boy noticed him and asked about Sasuke. Itachi told him what had happened and offered to take Naruto to see Sasuke. Naruto agreed and they left to go to the house.

Itachi went to his room to hunt for a new job. His job as a store clerk would never pay the bills alone, he would need a second one. He searched for hours and organized a few interviews. He hoped to get any one of them, for Sasuke's sake.

**A/N: I hope you like it as much as me. If you did or didn't please let me know so I can be a better writer. Thanks for reading.**


	4. Bonding

**A/N: I have officially gone through all chapters of this fic to edit them. The spelling errors and added or missing sentence chunks should all be gone now so you might want to go reread them. The mistakes were mostly because I type these on my phone qnd the touchscreen is really sensitive so it double presses and stuff.**

Sasuke was getting frustrated with his brother. Every morning this week he"d woken Itachi up in the hall outside his room, with a bottle of sake and a hangover. He'd thought today would be different because they had to go view apartments this afternoon. _Apparently not _ Sasuke thought as he shook Itachi's limp body. As he woke up he turned and asked " is it morning already?"

"It's like ten in the morning Ita, get up. We have to view apartments today." Itachi stood and silently went to make coffee. The boys had breakfast, showered dressed, and sobered Itachi up by 11:30 so they decided to go out for lunch. They ate at the same place they had the day their parents had died. As they sat in silence Sasuke decided to ask what he'd been wondering all week.

"Ita, what's wrong with you. I don't know if you've been paying attention, or if you even care, but your not acting like yourself. You stay up all night drinking and sleep all day to get over your hangover. You keep ignoring me and pretending like nothing happened, but it did. Itachi, our parents are dead, and all I have left is you. If you keep going like this...everything is falling apart and I don't know what to do. Please Ita, please come back to me!"

Sasuke was in tears, he wanted Itachi to say something, anything. It was quiet, as if the world was holding its breath, awaiting a response." Y'know, it's funny, a few days ago, when all this started...I promised I'd be better for you." Itachi spoke with a wry smile." I guess that really didn't work though because you're sitting here crying and it's my fault, and I don't know how to fix it." The two shared a look of deep sorrow, beyond anything they could imagine.

Sasuke stood and stepped over to Itachi. The two shared a hug, for a long time, enjoying the comfort and warmth of the embrace. After a few moments they got up and left, ignoring their half eaten meals. With a half hour left before their first walk through, the boys went to the park for a walk.

"Mom used to bring us here a lot when you were a baby. She used to let me push your stroller, until the time I ran away with you." Itachi smiled at Sasuke who looked horrified and asked "you did what?"

"Mom wouldn't buy me any dango, even though she normally let me have some. I was pushing your stroller when mom stopped to look at some birds. I remember I decided I had to go get my own dango, so I took off with your stroller to get it. When the dango man saw me, he gave me free dango and waited for mom to come looking for us. When mom showed up I refused to go, but when you started crying I thought you were mad at me so I left right away." Itachi was laughing slightly now.

Sasuke didn't know whether to be angry or touched about his apparent kidnapping. "Wow Ita...that's kinda funny. But dont even think about doing that now. I'm way too strong for you."

Itachi raised an eyebrow at his younger brother "oh really?" Sasuke nodded and crossed his arms. He knew Itachi would try something, but he was ready. "Hey look Sasuke, isn't that the pink haired girl you have a crush on?" Sasuke didn't even think before turning to see where she was. When he realized it was a trick, it was already too late. Itachi hoisted Sasuke up over his shoulder and carried him off toward the dango stand.

"Let me go. Put me down Itachi. I take it back, you're the strong one. Just put me down!" Sasuke's wish was granted as he was put down and handed a stick of dango which he ate gladly. As the boys headed out of the park Sasuke smelled the sweet smell of honey. He remembered there was a man here who sold honey he got from his own bees. He also remembered how he'd met the man.

"Hey Ita, do you remember the day I met tbe bee keeper?" Itachi looked confused so Sasuke explained. "I was just learning to ride my bike, you were teaching me. We were biking through the park when I saw my crush, Sakura. She waved at me, and i waved back, but I was so distracted that I ran straight into someone. I was covered in honey and dirt. I made you take me home but you made me go back to apologize. The guy taught us about beekeeping." Itachi began laughing at the mention of Sasuke coated in dirt, grass and honey. Sasuke would have been mad if he wasn't laughing just as hard.

The boys left the park and went off to view five apartments. Two were no good, they were filthy and had cockroaches. Another was too expensive due to a price increase. Two were perfect but only one had a special offer. The owner had to sell now so the boys were able to move in immediately after they paid. Of course they still had to sell the old place, but they bought it right away. Itachi used the money from the car to pay.

The place had a small kitchen, a living room, one bedroom and a tiny bathroom. Sasuke didn't want to live there but his family's money was split amongst their uncles so they had gotten nothing and had to rely on Itachi's paycheck. At least it came full of furniture, and Sasuke was promised the bedroom while Itachi would sleep on the couch.

About a week later they had sold the old house and were moving into the apartment. They were only bringing in some bedding tonight then the rest tomorrow. As Sasuke carried his pillows into the house (it came with a bed but no bedding) he asked, "hey Ita, what should we call the place? It needs a name." Their old home was known as Uchiha Manor. After a moment Itachi responded "how about the Uchiha complex, so it seems bigger." Sasuke nodded in agreement, he liked that idea, it could be their own little secret. A few minutes later the two were ready for bed. They wished eachother sweet dreams and went to sleep.

_Sasuke was standing on top of that building again. This had been a regular occurrence for a while now. It was sort of becoming a place he could go to think. Right now he needed this. He needed a chance to calm down. Sasuke stepped closer to the edge, he wanted to see the lights of the city. He sat down on the ledge and stared down at the lights were like stars, 'so beautiful' Sasuke thought. While he was on the subject of beauty he thought about Sakura. She was one of his best friends but he secretly had a crush on her. He wished he could bring her here, but he knew this place was just in his head. He would have asked her out already but rejection scared him. He had planned on it for the day after his parents died, but was thrown into this huge loop of sadness and fear. Still, he wanted to do it, so he decided that he would next time he saw her._


	5. update

Sorry, not a new chapter, just an update. So first of all I will be finishing tobi vs Akatsuk, and continuing diary of a fish. If I don't get more votes I will be forced to discontinue next hokage sorry. Also I have edited all chapters of lost but not alone and reposted them. The story is supposed to pick up in the next few chapters.I think there will be about 20 of them but my plans might change. As it stands now there is s character death (suicide) but I will probably change that. Anyways, if I get 100 views, I'll update everyday in that week. Anybody who reviews will be mentioned next chapter. I need reviews so I can hear what needs to improve. As a special treat here's a list of upcoming subjects, in no particular order.

Depression

Suicide

Alcoholism

Bullying

Death

Rejection

Loss of friends

Kidnapping

Financial problems

Self destruction


	6. Funeral

**A/N: It took less than two hours to get the 100 views I asked for so now I owe you guys a chapter every day this week. You must really like this story, I know I do. It really picks up in a few chapters. If you didn't notice each chapter switches to the perspective of the other brother. This chapter will come from both perspectives.**

Sasuke didn't want to go to the funeral. He had just begun to cope with the loss of his parents and now it would all be brought to the surface again. He was currently attempting to tie his tie for the umpteenth time. He never wore suits, Sasuke was more of a jeans and a t-shirt kind of guy. He had his fingers tied up and was choking a little, which made him more frustrated. He was ready to quit when Itachi walked over and did it for him.

Now they were ready to go, they were getting a drive from cousin Obito. He was the relative who lived closest to their apartment. When he showed up, Obito honked the horn and they got in the car. Sasuke examined his cousin in the rear view mirror. He was probably in his late twenties or thirties, with short, spiky black hair. What stood out were the marks all over his face. Apparently, when he was young he was crushed when his parents' house collapsed, or so Itachi had said. Though he had the awful scars, Obito could not necessarily be considered ugly.

When they arrived Sasuke went to sit in the mourning hall but refused to view the bodies. As he was sitting there he saw his cousin shisui and Itachi talking, he was glad to be left alone, Itachi looked like he wanted the same thing. He just wished they would get on with this ceremony already, it just made him want to cry. As he sat there he noticed his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out and checked to see it was from Naruto.

'Hows the funeral going'

'Hasn't started yet but I already wanna cry'

'I know it's hard but you'll get through it :)'

'How could you know how this feels'

'Um...I'm an orphan too dobe'

'But you never knew your parents, you've always been a foster kid'

'I still wish I could know them. You don't have to remind me that I never had any'

'On the contrary, you've had more than I can count'

'I don't believe you. I supported you and this is how you treat me! :('

'G2g ceremony is starting'

Sasuke was angry now. Naruto had no way of knowing how he felt. He decided to focus on the ceremony instead. First came the placing of flowers on the coffins then the speeches. Itachi was the eldest son and so he was expected to speak.

**********Itachi's P.O.V*************

Itachi stood and walked to the stage. He rustled his papers nervously. He had been unable to write anything worth saying so he would have to wing it.

"My parents were very proper people. They would want me to stand here and read something I'd written about them being in heaven. The thing is, I couldn't write anything because I don't believe in heaven. I've come to realize these past few weeks that my parents are gone. I will never see or speak with them again." Itachi sighed and blinked tears from his eyes." But that's okay, because they lived full lives. Yes they were taken from us too early, as were the people in the other vehicle involved in the crash. But we need to stop mourning their deaths, and instead celebrate their lives. My mother was a beautiful, talented, intelligent woman, and I want you all to remember her as just that. I want you to remember my father as a great, powerful, proper man who knew what he was doing and would risk his life to keep us all safe. Thank you all for being here and for listening."

Itachi went to sit as more speeches were read. Jokes were told, tears were shed and Itachi was soon ready to leave. He had to get up and go wash his face in the restroom. He stared at himself in the mirror, wishing he could just go home and sleep. He'd been working extra shifts and was quite tired. He had to send Sasuke home alone with Obito so he could head to work after the funeral so there was no rest in got back just in time for them to leave for the burial.

+++++++Sasuke's P.O.V+++++++++++

Sasuke stepped outside taking a breath of fresh air. He'd felt like he was choking in the hall, as speeches were given. The burial didn't last very long, but Sasuke felt a twinge in his stomach as his parents coffins were buried. It was lije a confirmation that they wouldn't come back. His mother would never tuck him in, or kiss his forehead, she would never bring him soup or bake him cookies again. He would never get to rush to the door and hug his dad when he got home alive or search for approval in those eyes ever again.

He cried quietly as he was lead to his cousin Obito's car. They drove for a long time, Sasuke crying silently. Eventually Obito asked if he wanted ice cream. He nodded, drying his eyes. He didn't care but he figured the sugar would calm his nerves. He ordered two scoops of double chocolate and Obito got a scoop of chocolate and one of maple. He scarfed down his ice cream so fast he got brain freeze, but he enjoyed the distraction.

Not only was Sasuke sad about his parents, but he worried Naruto was angry with him. When he finally got home he switched on the t.v to see one of his favorite shows was on. He laughed as Kagome said sit and inevitably Inuyasha fell on his face. He loved this show, it was hilarious. It only entertained him momentarily before he began to worry about Naruto again. He needed to vlear his head so he took a shower and headed to bed. He knew he could think this through in his happy place.

*******Itachi's P.O.V************

Itachi left work around eleven at night, knowing he would have to get back by eight the next morning. He knew he should go to bed but he'd set a date with Kisame to get drunk and wouldn't back out. Instead he got insanely drunk and fell asleep on the same chair he always did in the kitchen.


	7. working

**A/N: I am regretting issueing that challenge. I spent all day writing that chapter for you guys. If I can get 500 views I'll write an epilogue and maybe a sequel. By the way I had 117 views an hour and a half after I posted the challenge. So thanks!**

Itachi woke up to the sound of the front door slamming. Sasuke must be leaving for school. As he sat up he looked to see that it was 8:30. He panicked, he was supposed to be at work thirty minutes ago. He stood up but fell over when he felt a pounding in his head. He stood again, slower this time, he didn't have time for a hangover. He rushed to get dressed, and ran out the door, without eating or showering.

It took no time at all to get to work, but he got nauseous and almost threw up on the bus. When he reached the store, Yamanaka's flower shop, he rushed in to find his boss waiting for him.

"You're late and you reek of booze."

"I know, I apologize Mr. Yamanaka, it won't happen again, I promise."

"You're right about that. It will never happen again, because you're fired."

"But, Mr. Yamanaka, I have to take care of Sasuke. Please, my baby brother will starve."

"It's happened too many times Itachi, I'm sorry. Here's your final paycheck now get out."

Itachi took the cheque, and left. He couldn't believe it, now how would he feed Sasuke. He'd already been searching for a second job to pay bills, now he had to find another job to even out the income. He didn't know what to do, he was terrified that it would all fall apart. He started his long walk home, thinking of places to look for a new job. He decided to take a walk through the park. As he strolled down a dirt path, Itachi noticed that the berkeeper was closing shop early.

He stopped to ask why and the man told h he couldn't keep doing all the work. His mother was ill and he had to take care of her during the day. Seeing an opportunity, Itachi offered to take care of the shop for him. The man was skeptical until he heard Itachi's story. "An honest worker is one who needs to work" the man told him. Itachi was given a quick training session and told to sell as much as he could by days end. He would be payed half of what he made for now, depending on sales it might change.

Itachi spent a while at the shop but sold nothing. He decided he should be more aggressive with his advertisement so he started asking people who walked past if they wantex to buy. He got a few customers but not enough to pay the bills so he stepped it up again. Now he was rolling the cart of honey around yelling "fresh honey. Made by a professional. No chemicals. C'mon who doesn't love honey. This got a crowd to gather around him. He told them he'd eaten this honey since childhood and he loved it. He told them about how he'd met the beekeeper and how he knew him well.

Soon everyone wanted the honest beekeeper's honey. They were practically throwing money at him, he couldn't keep up. By noon he'd sold all the honey, including the extra cart full in the beekeeper's truck. He packed up the cart and put it in the back of the beekeeper's truck before wandering around the park. He bought some dango and strolled back to the truck, the long way.

When he arrived he found the beekeeper yelling about being robbed. He was promptly slapped in the face. The man was infuriated and didn't let Itachi explain for a long time. Eventually Itachi told him it was all sold and showed him the money. He received $150 and was told to be back tomorrow at the same he had all afternoon to do anything. He had no clue what to do with himself now. He decided to go visit his parents graves.

As he stood in front of the stones which had his parents' names engraved in them Itachi felt like dying. He could hardly breathe, as if his throat had closed in on itself. He missed them, this was the first time he'd admitted it to himself. Despite all the things they'd done to him, he wished they were still here with him. They had tried so hard to turn him into his father, but he refused. Even now, in looking after Sasuke he would never become his father. He promised himself, and his parents.

Feeling a rush of sadness, Itachi fell to his knees and cried. He cried for what seemed like forever. His breathing seemed to stop along with the whole world. It was as if the universe was giving him a moment of silence and peace to mourn his loss. He hadn't felt peace since his parents' deaths, maybe since his dream first happened. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt happy like this, genuinely at peace with the world. He enjoyed it for a long while, then said a small prayer for his parents' souls.

Feeling calmer than he ever had before Itachi decided to go pick Sasuke up from school. He wanted to tell him the news, though he didn't know whether to call it good news or bad news. As Sasuke stepped out the front doors of the school he saw Itachi waiting for him. He ran iver and explained that he was going for pizza with Sakura and Naruto. Itachi told him to be home by eight and to call if anything happened and then sent him off with his friends.

Itachi thought this would be good for his little brother. Sasuke had been out of school a lot so he must be having social troubles. Itachi was just glad to see that Sasuke still had supportive friends. He knew better than anyone how lonely things could get. He had needed a friend but only found one at the bottom of a bottle of sake. That had cost him his job, well being, happiness, and possibly the trust of his baby brother. He could never deal with that again, but he was glad someone had been there when he couldn't.

**A/N: I know this chapter was kinda slow and boring but next chapter things start to pick up. Itachi will regret a decision he made, Sasuke will make the wrong, right decision and in the end someone will die. Who will it be? Keep reading or you'll never know. By the way, I feel the need to issue a warning about this. I just watched corpse party so I'm pretty much ready to say or do anything. If you haven't seen it it's super gory and weird and it nakes me feel like i've officially seen it all. I might start writing some really weird stuff, so I apologize in advance for any trauma caused.**


	8. Kidnapping

**A/N: I posted this chapter without an authors note because I was rushing. I had to repost it so I could tell you guys thanks for keeping up with this story and also that I really want some reviews so I know what I need to do better. PLEASE REVIEW!**

Sasuke and his friends got to the pizza parlor at around 4:00. They went in, sat down, and ordered a pepperoni pizza for the three of them. Sasuke was terrified, he had told Naruto about his plans to ask Sakura out. Naruto looked at him and laughed quietly. When Sakura asked what was up, Naruto told her Sasuke had something to tell her.

Sakura looked at him quizzically and asked what was up. Sasuke tried to speak and instead let out a loud burp. "Ugh, why do boys have to be such pigs? It's so gross." 'Great job' Sasuke thought 'now she thinks you're gross.' He excused himself and tried to change the subject. "Hey guys, check out who's at table four. The idiot crew."

Sure enough, sitting across the room were Gaara, Neji, Lee, and Kankuro. Apparently they noticed Sasuke at the same moment he noticed him. Gaara pointed at Sasuke and said something inaudible to his friends. They stood and marched confidently up to Sasuke's table.

"What's up orphan boy, mooching some pizza off your so called friends. It's obvious you're too poor to buy your own. Y'know, I'm not really sure how you even have friends." Sasuke frowned. He was about to say something when Sakura beat him to it.

"Why don't you just leave him alone you big jerk. Seriously, it's pretty pathetic that you guys have nothing better to do with your lives. Besides it's not like any of you are all that great. Lee, we all know you're challenged. You have to work twice as hard for your grades. Kankuro, you wear makeup to hide your face because of a serious lack of confidence. Neji you're constantly competing to be considered better than your younger cousin. You don't stand a chance, she was born into the higher class sector of the family. Gaara, you have a tattoo for love and yet you walk around bullying others. You're a giant hypocrite!"

Gaara's face went from confused to angry to devious. He glared at the pink haired girl as he leaned forward until he was an inch from her face. "Who do you think you are, speaking to me like that?" He leaned away and slapped Sakura across the face, knocking her off balance. As Gaara lifted his arm for another blow Sasuke stood up and blocked him. "Look Gaara, this is between you and me. You have no right to hit her, and if you ever do it again kill you. I'm not joking. If you want a real fight then lets take this outside."

Sasuke knew he would be badly hurt if it happened, but he wouldn't let Sakura be hurt. Not by Gaara, not by anyone. Luckily for Sasuke, Gaara decided it wasn't worth and instead scoffed and left the shop. Sasuke was left standing there frowning angrily. He turned to Sakura who wss still recovering and asked if she was okay. She said she'd be fine and explained it was all just shock.

Sasuke was angrier than he'd been in a long time. He just wanted to get some sleep. He wished he could go to that place in his head, to clear his mind. He stood and said, "I'll see you guys at school tomorrow" before leaving for home.

++++++++++++Next Day++++++++++++++++++++

Sasuke hadn't slept very well last night, so he was still mad from yesterday. Now he was stuck in history class getting dirty looks from Gaara. Meanwhile, Iruka sensei was teaching about their shinobi ancestors." As you all know, thousands of years ago, Japan was filled with villages who trained great shinobi. Konoha city was founded in this era as Konohagakure..." Sasuke didn't particularly care. It was the last class of the day and he just wanted it to end.

His wish was granted as the bell rang. He stood and filed out of the room with the other students. He went to his locker and dropped off some books before heading out the front doors. As he turned the corner by Yamanaka's flower shop his worst nightmare came true.

Sasuke saw a flash of a face before being thrown to the ground. He heard a sickening crack sound as he hit the ground, and cried out in pain. Before he could catch his breath, Sasuke was lifted up and slammed into a nearby wall. A moment later he was punched in the stomach, then in the face. He heard Gaara's voice say,"this will teach you. You can't threaten me orphan boy."

He closed his eyes tight as he was punched again and again. His body ached and his mind screamed at him to protect himself, but he couldn't. He found himself unable to move at all. His body was hanging limp against the cold brick wall. He felt himself thrown, for a moment suspended in midair. It was a strange feeling, it reminded him of the feeling he got leaning over the edge of the building in his head.

Reality came roaring back as he felt himself land on a hard metal floor. He looked around to find himself in the back of a van. Sasuke was mortified as he realized he was being kidnapped. He cried out again in pain as he was beaten violently. They drove for ten minutes before the truck stopped, along with the beating.

Sasuke felt his body lifted from the vehicle and dropped harshly on the hard, rocky ground. The truck drove off a moment later, leaving Sasuke broken on the side of the highway. He could hardly move and his breathing was ragged. He realized there was no escape, he was either going to experience a miracle, or die here.

He layed there for what seemed like forever. His agony seemed unending as his body screeched in pain. He was only lucky enough to roll over before he threw up all over himself. It was just when the night had swallowed the last rays of sun, that he got his miracle. A police car stopped on the side of the road and an officer stepped out. The man leaned over Sasuke and said," I'm officer Fuuma, are you Sasuke Uchiha?"

"Y-y-yes, why do you know my n-name?"

"Your brother was worried when you didn't come home, he called the police to find you."

Sasuke explained what had happened and was transported to the hospital with serious injuries. He had surgery and was admitted for a week to recover. He was given some pain medication and sent on his way, with warnings to take it easy.

**A/N: That was a weird place to end a chapter but I caught a bad case of writers block. Sowwies!**


	9. Parenting

**A/N: Yes, guest the funeral was kinda late. I forgot I was supposed to have a funeral but late is better than never right. Anyway, I might not be able to update for a while from home. I'm on my highschool's wifi right now so I'll try as hard as I can.**

Itachi didn't know what to do. Sasuke was three hours late coming home. Yesterday, after the pizza parlor, Sasuke had slammed his bedroom door and demanded not to be disturbed. Itachi was worried about him, so he called the police to search for him. He wanted a drink of sake badly. He thought of the last time he'd done that and decided against it. Instead he paced in circles around the living room and stared out of the window worriedly.

After a few more hours Itachi received a call. He was told Sasuke was found on the side of the highway beaten badly. He was taken to Konoha city hospital, where he was currently in surgery. Itachi hung up the phone and ran out the door no shoes, no coat. He headed straight for the hospital.

When he arrived, Itachi was sweating insanely and his feet were bleeding but he ignired this. He was told his brother was still in surgery and the situation was grave. Itachi got his feet bandaged and then wandered into the waiting room where he sat and waited.

Itachi could hardly take it, first his parents and now his baby brother, what would he do. He couldn't bare the thought of losing Sasuke too. As he waited he began to cry. He cried until he had no tears left. The surgery went late into the night and eventually fatigue got to him and Itachi fell asleep.

Around 3:00am Itachi was woken up by a doctor. He was told that Sasuke's situation had been bad and they'd done their best, but Sasuke would not be guaranteed to remember much. He had taken several heavy blows to the head which may have affected his memory. Right now the boy was asleep but Itachi was permitted to visit stayed with Sasuke all night and waited for him to wake in the morning. The boy remembered most things but had forgotten his parents' names, Itachi's birthday and other small things.

When Itachi was given a bill from the hospital for Sasuke's care, he was horrified. He definitely could not afford this. He was only making up to $150 a day, which was hardly rnough already. He stared down at the paper and wondered what on Earth he would do about it. He would need another job, but so far he couldn't get a job even if he payed the employers.

As he stared at the page he noticed something strange. There was a signature on the bottom next to some text stating the bill had been payed. He called the hospital and asked about it. Apparently somebody had donated the payment in the nsme of his father.

Itachi thought for a long time about who it could be. Eventually he concluded it must be his father's old partner on the police force. Officer Fuuma, he had probably felt responsible for the boys, since he'd known them for so long. He called officer Fuuma too and asked him about it. His suspicion was confirmed and he thanked officer Fuuma profusely.

-Later That Day-

Itachi was worried constantly about Sasuke. He had let him rest all day but decided the boy needed to eat something. He pulled out mom's old recipes and chose one for Sasuke's favorite, omusubi with okaka. He brought the food into Sasuke's room and offered it to him. The poor kid wiced as he lifted the food to his mouth.

"You're taking your meds right? They'll help with the pain Sasuke."

"Yes Ita, I'm taking them. They don't really do much though. By the way, thanks for sending the cops, I would have died without them."

"You don't need to thank me, I was doing what any big brother would do. I was simply looking out for my otuoto."

"Well every brother doesn't run barefoot across the city to wait hours for his brother to be let out of surgery, only to find out he doesn't remember random stuff."

"Don't worry about your memory, the doctor says it might come back, if you rest. I just want you to get better."

"Itachi-nii...I love you."

"I love you too Sasuke kun."

The two hugged for a brief moment before Sasuke winced in pain. Itachi released him and helped him lay down comfortably. He sat for a while talking to Sasuke about what had happened then stood and left.

A short time later Sasuke's school received a call from an angry Uchiha who demanded the bullies be expelled. The principal tried to explain there was no proof but Itachi told him that Sasuke's injuries were proof enough. Eventually a meeting was arranged.

Itachi went to the meeting, ready to argue for days. When he stepped into the office he announced, " I won't stop until those boys are punished."

"Mr. Uchiha, I can't punish them. The incident happened off school grounds."

"It didn't last time."

"They have already been punished for that."

"Principal Sarutobi, I don't feel safe sending my brother to your academy while those boys still attend."

"We can arrange for Sasuke to change classes if you like."

"Sasuke shouldn't be published for their actions. If you won't expel them, then I'll be forced to have the police investigate them. If you keep this up, you'll be charged with obstruction of justice. Do you really want that ? Because I can make it happen."

The look on Sarutobi's face was strangely satisfying to Itachi. The man sat considering Itachi's warning. In the end he decided to expel the boys to avoid any unnecessary trouble. Itachi left the meeting smiling.

He saw Sakura and Narutoin the hall. They asked how Sasuke was and Itachi told them he was recovering, then victoriously announced the bullies were to be expelled.

This earned a small cheer from each of the two students. They asked if they could visit and he said it was a bad idea but they could call whenever they wanted. He left the school and headed home. On the way he picked up some tomatoes for Sasuke and some dango for himself. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, until he had that nightmare again.


	10. NO WIFI!

Hey all you geeks out there in internetland, I have somebad news lately the wifi has been really bad at home so my dad has taken to kicking me off of it. This weekend I probably won't be able to post at all, so all my stories are on hold for now. I had to type this on my phone during math class so I could warn you guys. Since I can't complete my half of the 100 views deal when I do update again I'll be posting 2 chapters of L.B.N.A and 2 of Tobi vs Akatsuki. I'm super duper sorry about this but I can't change. I hope you don't mind, anyway, I should go before I get my phone taken away. Byeeeeee!


	11. Faltering

**A/N: Hey guys, I'm back. Dad is letting me on the wifi again. Wooohoooo! I can write again. So here is the first one for today, the other will be up soon.**

Sasuke was woken up early in the morning by a scream. He jumped up and ran toward the sound, which had originated from Itachi. When he reached the living room he saw Itachi sitting on the couch, his face in his hands. He gave Itachi a moment to calm down before he stepped closer and asked if he was okay, Itachi said he was fine. Sasuke knew he was lying so he hugged Itachi, dragging him into a warm embrace.

The two sat, sharing a hug as they had done countless times since their parents' deaths. Sasuke felt a cool sweat run across Itachi's skin and figured it had been a nightmare. When Itachi had gotten over his fear, he offered to make pancakes but Sasuke declined. "I have a friend I have to talk to, but maybe when I get home." Itachi smiled and agreed to save some pancakes for Sasuke.

Sasuke slipped on his sneakers, grabbed his bag and took off out the front door. He walked down the road toward Naruto's house, deciding to talk to him bedore running his quick little errand. Naruto had asked to speak to him in person last night over the phone. He walked up the front steps and rang the doorbell. When there was no answer he knocked a few times with no response. He pulled out his used phone and texted Naruto who told him he was hanging out with Sakura and Hinata at the ice cream shop. Sasuke decided it wasn't a big deal and that he'd hunt him down later.

Now fully focused on his errand, Sasuke started his long walk to the house of a man named Kakuzu. He'd made this trip almost daily since the week he'd left the hospital. It didn't take long for him to reaxh the beat up old building. He stepped up to the door and knocked three times. A moment later the same young man as always stepped into the doorway. Sasori Akasuna, he worked for Kakuzu, who was only in it for the money. Sasuke thought Sasori must be an addict, because his eyes were always half lidded as if he were high.

"Hey Sasu-chan, how much?"

"The usual, here's the money, tell Kuzu I said hi."

Sasori smiled at that last part before disappearing into the house and returning with a syringe and some liquid in a small vial. As it turned out, the dealers had a friend in the medical business who supplied them. Sasuke took the vile and syringe and jammed them into a small pocket in his bag. He headed home to enjoy his dirty secret.

If his brother discovered Sasuke's addiction there would be serious consequences. Especially after he'd insisted Itachi quit his drinking and seek help. He felt almost hypocritical about it, but his circumstances were different. He was seeking the drug he was given for pain while in the hospital. Apparently it was highly addictive and his family was prone to addiction. He couldn't quit, he'd tried.

Sasuke rounded the corner that lead to his street and slowed his pace a little. He hadn't been gone long so he decided to walk around the block a few times. He got back around 11:00. He was satisfied that he'd wasted around two hours just walking in circles. He went inside and headed straight fir his room offering a "Yup" when Itachi asked if it was him. He set his bag down on the floor and walked over to his bedside table.

He pulled out a small rubber tube and a small black bag. He returned snd reached into his bag for his recent purchase. Having retrieved all the necessary supplies Sasuke prepared to complete this now daily ritual. He tied off his upper arm with the tube and grabbed the vial and syringe. He pulled about half the vial into the syringe, planning to save some for tomorrow. Now was the fun part.

Sasuke stuck the needle into his arm feeling the familiar pinch followed by the flow of liquid into his body. He tipped his head back to lean it on his bed (he had taken a seat on the floor beside the bed). He loved this part, it was like floating. Other than sleeping this was the only way Sasuke could reach his rooftop paradise. Sadly, sleep had been avoiding him lately.

He let himself soar, sighing at the deliciously free, loose feeling it gave him. Sasuke hated worrying, but when he felt that substance rush through his bloodstream, he forgot about it all. He could just sit and not think at all if he wanted. The problem was a few minutes later, when the high wore off. Sasuke's problems all rushed back like a slap in the face. He could hardly deal with his need for more. He wanted so badly to take the other dose, knowing he would have no doses tomorrow if he did.

Sasuke sat, considering whether he should take it. Eventually he stood, slowly pacing around the room. He sat back down and pulled the other dose into the syringe, not caring about tomorrow's regret. He pushed the needle into his arm again. He allowed the liberating substance to enter his bloodstream, sighing quietly. He didn't even bother to remove the needle from his arm, not particularly caring.

As Sasuke flew off into his drug filled universe something happened that he would regret for the rest of his life. He heard a soft 'click' and a 'creak' as the door opened. In stepped Itachi who was stopped in the middle of his question." Hey Sasuke, you want thise panca-." Itachi was interrupted by his own gasp as well as Sasuke's. The boys just stared at each other, Sasuke hardly able to keep from drifting into the world his syringe brought him to.

"W-what are you doing Sasuke?" Was all that was heard before the world came crashing down on top of two innocent boys, and those around them.


	12. Arguing

**A/N: So I dunno about all of you guys but I HATE exams. They are the major reason why I haven't updated for like a week. It's like...very study, much wow, herp derp. I'm sorry it's been so long but I'm trying really hard here. I have to study history, english AND math! AAAAAHHHHH I'M GOING INSANE! anyway...here you go.**

Itachi knew Sasuke had been seriously depressed since the funeral, but this...he had no excuse. His baby brother was sitting on the floor beside his bed, his arm tied and a needle in his arm. Itachi noticed an empty vial on the floor. He couldn't process this, this morning Sasuke was his pancake loving baby brother, and now he was a drug addict. Itachi didn't know what had happened, he was confused.

He stood in utter shock as it dawned on him that this was all his fault. If he had just watched Sasuke a little closer, or quit his drinking a little sooner, this would never have happened. He wondered if Sasuke had a stash of some kind, he would have to destroy anything Sasuke hadn't used. In a blind rage he grabbed Sasuke's arm and dragged him out into the hall. He ignored the complaints of " Itachi that hurts" as he forced the boy out and slammed the door.

He heard the door open again as he rummaged through Sasuke's drawers. He threw Sasuke's clothes on the floor, not caring if he made a mess, he had to find the boy's stash. "Oi Itachi, that's mine, get outta there. You have no right to do that." Itachi turned to look Sasuke in the eye. His face contorted into the angriest expression he could make.

"After what I just saw, I have every right and reason to do this. You'll be lucky if I don't ground you until you turn thirty! Sasuke, what the heck were you thinking, that stuff could kill you!"

Sasuke looked terrified for a moment before putting on a tough expression and responded." It hasn't yet!"

"And how long have you been doing it for?"

"S-since the week I left the hospital. It's the medicine they gave me for the pain, I couldn't stop taking it."

"Show me your stash. I want to see all of it NOW. Then you will get the honor of taking it outside and smashing every last bit of it. If you don't show me, I will find it and I will call the police on you."

Sasuke looked at the floor then back at Itachi as if making a decision." I don't have any left, I used it all. I swear, I buy doses daily and I already did today's and tomorrow's. Itachi, please don't call the police, okaasan and tousan wouldn't want that."

Itachi glared at the boy, he didn't believe him for a second. As for the thing about their parents, it outraged him. "So what, you think they would want you to be doing drugs. Sasuke think before you speak."

"You should take your own advice. It's not like they would want you to be drunk for a week straight and then every night after that! This goes both ways and I'm sick of you acting like it doesn't. Just because they aren't here doesn't mean you get to turn into dad." Sasuke was crying now, as the two yelled back and forth.

"I volunteered to take care of you and that means I have to act more like a parent and less like a brother!"

"I didn't ask you to Itachi. I'm not some poor stray puppy who needs s home. I can look after myself."

"Yeah, you've done a fine job so far. I hadn't realized you hated me so much just for loving you. If you really don't want me to look after you, then just get out already. I don't care anymore."

"Fine, if you really don't want me here then I'll leave. You don't have to be like dad anymore because you won't have to worry about me. After today, I won't be a burden anymore."

Snapping back to his senses, Itachi realized what he'd done. He had just sent his brother to live on the streets because he was angry. He had to convince Sasuke to stay, but apologizing wouldn't work. He had to think fast to keep Sasuke here with him. "Where do you suppose you'll go Sasuke?"

"Anywhere is better than here with you!" Sasuke turned around and ran barefoot out the door, slamming it behind him. Itachi wanted to chase after him, but he knew it would be pointless. Sasuke was impossible to talk to when he was mad. Instead Itachi would have to sit around and hope Sasuke was okay.

He pondered how it could all have come to this. What had he done to deserve all of this turmoil. His parents were dead, he could hardly pay bills with two jobs, he was an alcoholic, and his brother was an addict. He had been well behaved, done good in school, never commited any crimes, so why?

"God, why did my life turn out like this. I've been so horribly naive, running through life like nothing could touch me. Dad did that, look where it got him."

In frustration Itachi hurled a book at the wall, leaving a dent. He was so mad at himself for letting things go this far, he could hardly focus. He just needed to stop thinking, to find some relief, and suddenly he understood. He realized why Sasuke had done what he had. For the same reason Itachi had spent a week in a drunken stupor. He wasn't addicted to the drug, but the relief of leaving the world behind. Sasuke had just wanted to forget about his awful fate.

Now Itachi felt even worse. He had made a huge mistake reacting that way. This changed everything, knowing what he'd taken from the boy. He may have just ruined Sasuke's only safe haven from the terrors of the world. He had to fix this, fast or it could take an ugly turn. He stood up and rushed to the door, stopping to grab a bottle of sake on the way. He got in the car and drove off, pulling out his phone. He had to make a few calls or he would never get Sasuke back.

**A/N: I also just wanted to say good luck and have fun in school to that guest who reviewed. Also I don't mind if you can't read right away, I'm doing this for your entertainment so as long as you read It doesn't matter. Also it's kinda funny how your school starts when mine ends. Hope you do well in school. BYEEEE.**


	13. more updating

Wassup guys. Got some big news to tell. I'm SO EXCITED! LBNA officially has 500 views. That means there will be an epilogue but the sequel is still iffy. If you want a sequel I'll do it but if I don't here about it enough then I won't waste my time. So if you want it ask for it in the reviews (i check them all the time). You can pm me too I guess but only if you have something really long and important to say. I just wanna say thanks a million times for all the views. I know 500 isn't much compared to others but I love the idea that my writing is enjoyed ( or not i dunno) by so many people. So thanks guys.

Sorry there are so many updates lately. Im having wifi problems again and some personal issues so I have been sorely lacking in writing time. Thankfully school ends in like a week for me, after that I'll have all kinds of time to write. I know things picked up in the last chapter and it sucks to have to wait but hang in there. Those of you who stick with me will be rewarded with an epicly epic conclusion! Again I am REALLY sorry for not updating. I don't have enough time in school to type a whole chapter or you would get them daily.

Thanks for sticking around and reading!


	14. Running

**A/N: My exams start in two days but I still found time for this chapter. Sorry if you have been awaiting my return with bated breath. Exams take up SO much time, I just can't write like i could when school was going. Hope this will tide you over for the week.**

Sasuke was angrier than he had ever been before. Itachi had just kicked him out. He was such a hypocrite, he had spent a week drunk once, but Sasuke couldn't even consider drugs. In an angered frenzy, Sasuke took off toward Naruto's house, and pounded on the door until he answered. When Naruto finally opened the door Sasuke was in tears. He was quickly ushered inside. He sat down on Naruto's beat up old bed, and waited for the boy's inevitable return, hopefully with ice cream. He would have to sneak it, as he lived in a foster house and the house father said no junk food after a certain hour.

A few minutes later Naruto returned with two spoons and a bucket of triple chocolate truffle ice cream. As the boys dug in with their spoons, Naruto asked what had happened.

"Itachi caught me...doing my second dose this afternoon. He just...he kicked me out. I don't know what to do, he was so angry. I've never seen him like that before.

"Man, that's rough. He'll let you back home tomorrow, I'd let you stay here tonight but the house father is already going to kill me for the ice cream. You should see if Sakura will let you stay at her place." Naruto looked worried and a little disappointed.

"I'll go see her in a bit, right now I have ice cream to take care of" Sasuke replied shoveling ice cream into his mouth. "I'm just glad to have you around for times like this. I don't know how I'd do this without your help." Sasuke had meant that too. He had calmed down considerably since arriving here. That was when things realky went wrong.

"Um...yeah. Listen, Sasuke there is no easy way to say this...I'm leaving next month. A foster family has picked me, they were sending me away sooner until I asked for more time to say goodbye. I don't get a say in this. The thing is, they live across the country in Hoshigakure. We won't be able to visit much." Naruto looked away as he spoke, avoiding eye contact at all cost.

"You-y-you're leaving? How could you leave at a time like this. Have you even met them yet?" Sasuke was frustrated but he wanted to keep somewhat calm.

"Yes I have. Tsunade and Jiraya are great people. I'm excited to live with them. I thought you would at least be happy that I finally have parents. I guess I was wrong."The two glared at each other momentarily. Soon Sasuke broke eye contact and stormed out, shouting that when he needed a friend, his so called 'best friend' was leaving him.

Sasuke found himself crying again as he rushed out the door. He turned down the road and off roward Sakura's house. By now the last rays of sunlight had been drowned out by the dark of night. He ran down the street, without his shoes, or socks. He hadn't worn any when he left the apartment, he had forgotten all about this until he stepped on something sharp. He glanced down to see a smashed sake bottle beneath his foot, now coated with blood.

Unable to run, but wanting to find refuge, Sasuke limped toward Sakura's house. Two blocks later he stumbled up to Sakura's front door, and rang the doorbell. When no answer came he rang again, soon he started ringing the bell like a mad man. He wanted to get inside, his foot ached and he was tired. When she finally answered the door, he was crying again, unable to control his emotions.

She ushered him inside and sat him on the couch asking him questions about what had brought him here. He explained it all, from the drugs, to Naruto's departure, to his bloody foot that she bandaged up. There was a strangely comforting silence as she wrapped the bandages around his injured apendage. She was so careful, as if one mistake might kill him in an instant. He wanted to say something, tell her about his feelings, but he worried she would kick him out. Instead he sat patiently, refusing to so much as wince, so as not to worry her any more.

When she was finished she stood up and offered him the guest bed. He thanked her profusely and said yes. As he stood, he felt a harsh pain rip through his foot, and collapsed. He looked up to see Sakura offering her shoulder. She helped him up and situated his arm on her shoulder. The two slowly made there way to the guest room. Sasuke tripped a few times, but Sakura caught him each time, smiling as she resettled him.

When they finally reached the room Sasuke sat on the bed, with help. He couldn't lay down though, due to the fat cat laying on the bedspread. Sakura reached over to push the furball away but was...interupted. As she reached over her face got close to Sasuke's. Needing to show his feelings, the young man reached foreward and pressed his lips to hers. He indulged in the contact for the split second before she pulled away.

"Sasuke w-what are you doing?" Sakura looked frustrated. "What the heck do you think you're doing?" She made a face that showed concern and anger at the same time.

"I-I-I thought...I mean don't you...um. Sa-Sakura, I um, I really like you." Sasuke blushed as his feelings were confessed. He realized now that his feelings were probably not reciporicated.

"Sasuke, I thought we were just friends. I don't really like you that way, I'm sorry." All anger had disappeared from her face leaving only concern. Against his will, tears welled up in Sasuke's eyes. He tried to blink them away but it didn't help. Fearing she would consider him less of a man, he looked toward the floor. "I have to leave" he said as he stood and rushed out of the room. She called after him as he rushed out the door.

When he stepped outside it was raining, he suddenly wanted his old hoodie. Not just for protection from the rain. That sweater offered comfort whenever he was upset, it had become a sort of 'safety blanket' for him. He wondered if he should dare to go home for it, he would have to sneak in or Itachi would start another argument. He felt cold, and wanted to get out of the rain. He knew his only option was to go home, but he hesitated a while, hoping Itachi would be calm when he got there. After about five minutes he wandered off toward the apartment, and his brothers inevitable anger.


	15. Ignoring (conscience)

**A/N: Please review guys I really need to know what I'm lacking. I want the next chapter to be as good as it can. No new chapter till I get at least two new reviews. Also sorry the chapter is small. This was best written short and sweet.**

Itachi had paced the floor for a while before he took action. He had called up his friend Kisame, shortly followed by the police. He had thought about the differences in Sasuke since the tragedy of his parents' deaths and realized something. Chances were Sasuke would not come back. Instead he'd spite Itachi with danger, like by o.d-ing or getting hit by a car on purpose. The boy had sort of gained a tendency for angered risk taking. Sadly the police had said he should wait 24 hours before filing a missing persons report. Despite Itachi's protests, the officer had maintained that there was nothing she could do. Now he and Kisame were driving around town searching for Sasuke.

They drove around for what felt like forever, with no sign of the boy. Once Itachi thought he saw Sasuke, outside the Yamanaka's shop, but he blew it off, because Sasuke was wearing blue, not red. He was sure he remembered the boy wearing black jeans and a blue t-shirt. They continued to search all over town in Kisame's car. With no hope left after four hours of fruitless searching, the two decided to go get some food and drinks at a local bar. As they entered Senju's bar and grill, Itachi considered that drinking may be a poor choice for him right now. In his worried state of mind, he decided to ignore his conscience and pray he could drink this problem away, though he knew it was futile. It had never helped before, no matter how hard he had tried, and oh he had tried.

Itachi drank enough to satiate two men and let Kisame pay. Afterwards, he was loaded into his friend's car and taken home. By the time he laid down on the couch to sleep it was midnight. Knowledge of the wicked hangover to come seemed to give him more incentive to drink as he downed another bottle of sake. At least he thought it was sake, he was so drunk it could have been milk for all he knew. He nonchalantly tossed the empty bottle across the room, giggling as it smashed into tiny pieces.

Apparently he had succeeded in his quest to forget, because Itachi couldn't even remember the days events. He had completely forgotten about his missing baby brother, who could be dead for all he knew. Instead of worrying, Itachi rolled off of the couch and went to get a snack. He opened the fridge and stared at its contents blankly. Seeing nothing of real interest he turned to check the cupboards but was distracted by something on the table. He looked closer to see a cake sitting on a tray in the middle of the table.

Itachi sat down to cut himself a slice of cake but he suddenly felt very tired. After having cut off a quarter of the cake and setting it on a plate, Itachi was ready to dig in. Too bad for him, before he could lift his fork, he fell asleep, landing face first in the delicious chocolate treat. He hadn't even noticed the tear stained note laying on the table next to the cake, that signed by his brother. He didnt even know the boy had been home looking for him. Now it may have been to late for things to be fixed. Someday, Itachi would regret ignoring his conscience.


	16. I'm a lazy derp

**A:N/ So you are probably looking at this thinking 'Where has secrets been' or 'why hasn't secrets been updating' or possibly even 'WHERE THE FLIP HAS SECRETS BEEN, LIKE HIDING UNDER A ROCK OR SOMETHING?' The answer to your questions is simplified into one word: laziness. I just took a few days to lay around and do nothing but now I'm finally getting back on track. I plan to update daily throughout the summer but one day next week I probably won't. My parents are both off work that day so we are going to the freak lunchbox ITS THE BEST CANDY STORE EVER!They gots everything you can think off but in candy form! Anyways I'm super sorry that I didn't write anything for you guys. By the way...I did great on my exams...except math but I still passed it!**


	17. Flying

Blue not red.** A/N/ So sorry for not updating guys. I didn't plan for that to happen but I lost all inspiration for a few days there. Now im sitting in the school cafeteria waiting for my brother to finish up his two to three hour grad rehearsal. I'm literally the most bored being in existence right now so I figure I'll give it a shot.**

Sasuke had made his way home only to realize his favorite sweater was missing. He looked all over the apartment, creating a giant mess. After a long time he decided to give up and at least change his shirt. He removed his blue shirt and replaced it with a clean red one. He also changed his jeans leaving his soaked clothes on the floor of his room.

He immediately headed back out into the rain, not wanting to run into Itachi. He ignored the thought to put on a jacket but put on some sneakers to keep his feet safe. After stepping in glass once he was never going to do it again. It had hurt terribly on his way home. Not having any place in particular to go, Sasuke wandered the streets, thinking about everything that had happened.

'My parents are dead. My drunkard brother, who should be taking care of me doesn't want me around. My best friend is leaving to live on the other side of the country. To top that all off, the girl of my dreams rejected me. I'm freezing cold, it's pouring rain, I can't go back home, I can't go to Naruto's or Sakura's. What am I going to do?'

As Sasuke walked he considered his options, and it seemed there weren't many. He thought about his happy place, how could he get there with no bed to sleep in? There was no way without going to the roof of an actual building to see if it worked. Sasuke stopped dead in his tracks, turned and ran for home. It was the only building he knew he get on top of. The fire escape lead to a ladder that lead to the roof. Even with the stinging in his foot he ran at top speed the entire way there. He somewhat carelessly scaled the ladder and climbed victoriously onto the cold cement of the roof.

Sasuke wandered around atop the building. Eventually it devolved into pacing back and forth, trying to calm his nerves and stop the flow of tears on his face. He felt so hated, like nobody wanted him around anymore. Since his parents deaths he had become a burden. He was the reason Itachi had to get two jobs, to pay for his foolish needs and wants. Naruto had been burdened with the responsibility of telling Sasuke his awful news and dealing with the aftermath. Sakura was burdened with trying to protect Sasuke from the bullies and ridicule. She had always stood up for him when he couldn't do it himself. Now he had pushed his limits and they all wanted him gone.

Tears streamed down Sasuke's face as he stepped to the edge of the roof. He peeked over it, wondering how far the drop was. 'If you want me gone then I guess I owe all one last favor' thought the boy. He stood on the edge and stared downward, his tears now mixed so well with rain you couldn't tell them apart. He stood for what felt like a lifetime but he knew was only a few short moments. Sasuke thought how funny it was that he only now realized that life was made of short moments. For instance, the moment of his birth followed the moments of his first to fifth birthdays. His first day of school, his first friend, first 'A', and his first 'F'. Then came the bad moments. The moment of his parents' deaths, all the moments with bullies, and drugs, and the repeated rejections.

All of the moments in life, lead a person to what they are in death. His moments had brought him here. He was just another lonely reject, an orphan with no friends. He wasn't necessary to the world, it would be better off without him. He steadied himself and shut his eyes. He wanted to feel like he was flying again, like in his dreams. He let the wind and rain brush against his face. It felt good, like it was washing away his worries and fears. For a moment he thought that he may not be the burden he had thought he was.

Before Sasuke could step back and reconsider he slipped on the wet cement and went tumbling from the roof. In the seconds before hitting Sasuke shut his eyes once more and let the wind carry him away. He knew that as long as his eyes stayed closed he could be a bird, soaring through the air. He now had one more moment to add to his list; the moment fate took hold and left no hope of return.

As he hit the ground Sasuke felt a sharp pain through his back and everything went numb. He stayed there watching his own blood mix with rain on the cold pavement. Even with blurred vision he still stared at the red liquid, becoming runny when mixed with rain. 'I never noticed what a pretty color of red blood was' he thought. He wasn't crying anymore he was glad for that because people were staring at him and he didn't want to appear weak. He felt tired and he struggled to think straight, he wanted to move but he could only feel the pain in his back and his head.

'I guess fate wants this, and I can't stop it' the boy thought as he lay splayed on the pavement. He hadn't even gotten a chance to fly and now he was just a bird with broken wings.

**A/N: it has now been almost two weeks since the school cafeteria and I am finally done this chapter. I have no excuse...and I'm sorry. I hope you all stuck with me as I did absolutely no work. I plan to finish all of my currently updating stories this week so enjoy. Thanks for reading, peace out!**


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